Bully-proofing” programs require schools to protect students from each other by targeting and eliminating “bullies.” However, if kids need to depend on their school to get rid of bullies, they are likely to stay victims for a very long time. In contrast, “Victim-proofing” teaches kids how not to be victims. When they know the simple rules, no one can bully them. And their problem disappears almost immediately.
Victim-Proof Your School is the simplest, most effective program you can find to reduce bullying and prevent violence. It is a truly American system that promotes freedom of speech, the cornerstone of our democracy. It teaches practice of the Golden Rule and is consistent with the major principles of wisdom, psychology and religion. The following table shows some of the basic differences between typical “bully-proofing” programs and Victim-Proof Your School.
Bully-proofing
Victim-proofing
Victims rely on school staff and student bystanders to protect them from bullies
Victims solve their bully problems all by themselves
Staff side with victims against bullies, and reward kids for thinking and acting like victims—promoting a victim mentality that handicaps kids for life
Gets rid of the victim mentality—kids become more resilient, independent and emotionally mature
Punishes bullies, making them angry and vengeful, leading to more intense bullying
Defuses bullying, so there is no retaliation
Requires school staff to spend more time as anti-bullying law enforcement officers
Allows staff to spend less time enforcing laws and more time teaching
Categorizes people into “virtuous victims” and “evil bullies”
Shows kids they determine whether people are their bullies or buddies
Teaches kids to blame bullies for their problems
Teaches kids to take responsibility for their own problems
Violates Freedom of Speech
Promotes Freedom of Speech
Violates the Golden Rule by bullying bullies
Promotes the Golden Rule by treating bullies as buddies
 
What does the Victim-Proof Your School program include:
DVD for students, teaching them how to handle bullying without anyone’s help and without getting anyone in trouble.
DVD for school staff, showing how typical adult intervention actually makes the bullying problem worse, and how to respond to acts of bullying in a manner that reduces bullying while enhancing kids’ emotional development. Also shows staff how to effectively handle bullying by angry students and parents.
A detailed Trainer’s Manual that explains how to use all Izzy Kalman’s role-plays so that school staff can become experts at “victim-proofing.”
An Online survey form that will enable you school to measure bullying before and after implementation of the program, so that the effects of the program on your school can be evaluated.
Read what others have said about the Bullies to Buddies™ Victim-Proof Your Schoolprogram.
Finally, a program that works near miracles in helping victims to deal with bullies. After more than two years of implementing Izzy’s principles, the students at William Snyder Elementary School smile at one another with confidence. Our school climate is pleasant and conducive to learning. Discipline referrals for bullying behaviors have decreased significantly. Teachers can now teach more because the kids are handling their own issues. And (drum roll here)…our test scores are going UP. In a school where the population is 63% Hispanic, our school reached every testing goal. In my 15 years as a school counselor, I have never seen a more effective social skills program. This one is pure genius.– Jeannie Brewer, School Counselor, Snyder Elementary, Las Vegas, Nevada
We at PSI were so impressed with the simplicity and common sense of the Bullies to Buddies™ program that we had to make it our own. We have partnered with Izzy Kalman and Cleveland State University to bring this program to the thousands of students that PSI serves. – Steve Rosenberg, PhD, Psychologist, President, PSI Solutions, Ohio
Of all the approaches to the problem of bullying, Izzy Kalman’s approach stands out. It has worked wonders for my patients and friends alike. – Doris M. Greenberg, MD, Developmental and Behavioral Pediatrician, Savannah, Georgia
Israel C. (Izzy) Kalman, MS, Nationally Certified School Psychologist and psychotherapist, is one of the world’s masters of teaching people to stop being victims. He has worked intensively with kids, schools, parents and clients for almost three decades. Over 25,000 mental health professionals and educators have attended his seminars to learn his quick, powerful approach to controlling anger, reducing bullying, solving relationship problems and promoting harmony. His recent book, Bullies to Buddies: How to turn your enemies into friends, is a distinguished iParenting Media Award Winner, 2005. He is a frequent guest on radio and TV shows, and many magazine and newspaper articles have featured his work.